Babies

I seriously never realized how many babies there were in this town. At least, until I heard we couldn't have any of their own. There are babies at the commissary, gurgling while their mother decides which diapers to get; they're at Walmart crying big fat tears because they're done shopping; they're at the base pool, floating around in their mothers' arms; there are little kids picking out puppies at PetSmart; there are adorable little girls at church, running through the aisles while their mothers hiss at them to sit down and be quiet. The only place I'm really safe from babies is at home, and that is only providing I leave the TV and radio off, because good grief every other commercial is for babies, about babies, or features a baby. And then I'm not even talking about all those baby-centered shows such as The Duggars: Eighteen and Counting, A Baby Story, and Jon and Kate Plus Eight (although I suppose that that show should be renamed to Jon or Kate Plus Eight).

It could be that my memory is playing tricks on me, and considering my recent bout of forgetfulness this is in fact very likely, but I don't remember ever living anywhere where there was such a focus on kids. The only thing we have more of, is Kudzu. Seriously. In a way, it makes sense though. As I tell my husband a lot, in a military town like ours, there is not a whole lot to do. As I have lamented over and over again, our town seems to consist mainly of car dealerships, chain restaurants, and Walmarts. Add to that the fact that most military spouses find it nearly impossible to have a career of their own, and you have people who really have nowhere else to tun but make babies. And I'm not blaming them. Because if you have kids, this town suddenly makes a lot more sense. Then every McDonald's is not an eyesore, but a place for your kids to play. The Target is not a really ugly big building, it's a place where you can buy affordable children's clothing. And churches are a great place for your kids to engage in free sports, crafts, and field trips.

However, it doesn't exactly do much for me right now. Apart from wearing a blindfold everywhere I go, there is very little I can do to avoid seeing these little bundles of joy. What we need is an assignment in a big city. One with lots of yuppies, and singles, and independent movie theaters, and little boutiques, and a ton of theaters, and no children. It sounds wonderful.

Now excuse me while I brace myself for yet another trip to Walmart. The toy section, to be more specific.