The second amendment

When you sit and think about it, it's amazing that I've managed to live in the US this long, and never once write about that much-contested second amendment: "The right to keep and bear arms". For those of you in Europe, that debate might seem to center on gun-toting anarchists in northern Montana and statements like "From my dead, cold hands" by has-been celebrities, but let me tell you, it's a lot more than that.

When living in Europe, it's really easy to take the stand that normal people really don't have a reason to keep guns in their home. And you know, for Europe, that makes a lot of sense. After all, Europe is not really known for its wild bear population, its rabid foxes, wild coyotes, poisonous snakes, snapping turtles, or any other wild animal that could possibly threaten your life. So when I first walked into my in-laws home, and was shown their impressive collection of shotguns, to say I was a little taken aback, would be an understatement. That soon changed, however, when a snapping turtle appeared in the family pond, the same pond where our boys fish, play around in their canoe, and build sandcastles. Since we like our children with all their hands, feet, and all other body parts intact, husband-dear and I ended up standing guard on the dock with a shotgun for about half a day, waiting for the beast to reappear. It did, and we are fairly certain that husband-dear sent it to the eternal marshlands in the sky. It sounds very cruel, but when it's between a wild animal and my kids, you know, the kids, even though they can be a huge pain, well, they win out.

So when we moved to Georgia, my view on guns had softened a little bit. I still really don't like the idea of people keeping guns in their suburban home, but I am beginning to understand it a little better. Like when my friend Kay told me they kept a shotgun in their bedroom for when her husband deploys. They don't have any ammo, never have, and last time I checked, they're not ever sure what kind of bullets their gun takes, but Kay likes the idea of having something to scare off potential intruders while her husband is away and her kids are asleep in the next room. Since my brother and I used to both have a baseball bat under our beds for when our parents were out of town, I can see where she's coming from.

It's become a fact of life that when you walk into any Walmart, you will see rows upon rows of guns next to the camping gear and outdoor sporting equipment. I no longer raise an eyebrow when I help someone move and find a box of ammunition in their closet. Again, think about the baseball bats / hockey sticks Dutch people might hide under their beds. And signs by the side of the road upon entering campus, reminding people that this is a gun-free zone no longer send me into a tizz about gun laws in general, but merely make me realize that with our students' propensity to totally lose their cool, that is probably a great idea.

But sometimes gun laws lead to interesting dilemmas. This morning I heard about a specific story in GPB that had me laughing all the way down the interstate. You see, in Georgia, you are allowed to carry a gun on your person if you have a permit. However, the Atlanta airport has outlawed any guns on airport property. That makes sense to me, you know, keeping within the whole "let's keep our country safe" paradigm. But apparently it doesn't to everyone, because one of the state senators introduced a bill to lift this ban. And the reason I found this bill so interesting was because of the reasoning behind it. You see, according to Senator Shafer on GPB, this bill would "make clear that you can pick someone up from the airport without having to toss your gun onto I-285 as you exit". You can't beat that logic, now can you?

Well, of course you can. I mean, maybe I'm wrong, but don't most people plan to pick someone up from the airport? And when they do, they can plan to leave their gun at home? I personally can't think of too many "airport-pick-up-emergencies" that would warrant such a law. And even in that case, I'm sure that too can be fixed: "Honey, I totally forgot your mother is coming to town, I'm driving to the airport now to go get her. Can you meet me at the Exxon on I-75 to get my gun?". Or "Honey, I totally forgot your sister is coming to town, but I have my gun in my car, can you call her and tell her to walk down the ramp to I-85, and I will pick her up right by junction 22?"

Obviously, I've never faced this problem, and never will, so perhaps I'm underestimating the predicament millions of Georgians face every year. But all I really have to say about that is that legalizing guns might make sense, but it sure leads to some interesting dilemmas.