It's been far too quiet on the my-job-drives-me-to-the-brink-of-something front lately. For those of you who have been wondering whether my endearingly dramatic students have suddenly seen the light and started behaving well, turning in work on time, and participating in class: no, I'm sorry, but they haven't. I just figured there's only so many times I can write about terrible spelling, perpetual tardiness, and the other misery that plagues college professors all around before it gets old.
There has, however, been a new type of behavior that's been on the rise this semester. One that woke up the budding anthropologist inside of me, and definitely warrants closer attention. For lack of a better word, I'm going to call it the "eye-sigh".
The eye-sigh. A complicated physical expression, which holds a plethora of social meaning. For those of you wondering what on earth I'm talking about: the eye-sigh usually starts with a roll of the eye, which is coupled to a head thrust back, and ends with a loud and forceful sigh or snort. From my, however limited, observations it is mainly used by students of the female gender, although the males do have an equivalent behavior. The male version eschews the head thrust and exchanges the sigh for a grimace or a short hiss. The meaning, however, is the same and can best be translated as "Are you freaking kidding me?!"
Whereas previous student cohorts would express their dissatisfaction with a new assignment, the announcement of a test, or my request to turn off a cellphone in a most verbal manner, this year, non-verbal has been the way to go. Although eye-rolling has always been a part of a standard student response, I've never had students replace verbal protesting with such elaborate posturing. In fact, one of the reasons this semester as well as the previous one has been so much less drama-filled is because I've received almost zero spoken in-class feedback.
You would think that as the person in front of the class, I love the fact that my students have stopped trying to argue deadlines, assignments, and other rules and regulations. And three years ago, I probably would have agreed with you. But in all honesty, the eye-sigh has been driving me batty. It's not the fact that students aren't happy with the latest project, grade, or enforced rule, since they very rarely are, it's the fact that it's so incredibly passive aggressive.
See, for all my dishing out, I can take it pretty well too. I will tell students how it is ("if you have a hard time getting up for class at 9:50, how do you think that morning-drive-DJ-gig you're vying for is going to work out?"), but I have no qualms dealing with their comebacks either. It opens up a dialogue, allows me to explain myself, understand their point of view, and most of the time we all end up with a good laugh. I think I can actually state with confidence I enjoy the banter. I mean, just last week I had the following gem of a conversation with a student:
"Katie, please don't play with your phone."
"I don't have my phone! See it's not on my desk."
"No, it's in your lap."
(Student surreptitiously takes phone into hand), "No it's not, see! My lap is empty."
"That's excellent. In that case, please stop staring at your lap. Call me silly, but that's really distracting."
Who wouldn't prefer that over the eye-sigh? It reinforces my rules, makes the point, and entertains Katie's peers. What more could an instructor want? We laugh, we learn, we move on. It's great.
But when all students do is the eye-sigh, you've got nothing. Nothing to respond to, nothing to explain, nothing, except the feeling that perhaps you're not entirely appreciated right then. I've tried addressing it both seriously ("please don't roll your eyes at me") and in a pathetic attempt at humor ("What was that (insert awkward imitation here)?"), and the best I've gotten is either a second eye-sigh or a "I wasn't rolling my eyes. My contacts were bothering me/There's something in my eyes/My eyes are really dry."
People, does it get any more passive aggressive than that?
I've been thinking. Maybe it's me. Maybe I'm too scary, too intimidating. Maybe I have too many rules, and need to my students be the free spirits that they are.
And then I think some more. And decide that maybe, well, maybe not.
1 comment:
I think it really is passive aggressiveness, and that it's the worst and most insidious ways to create a very poisonous environment. I've seen it in nursing, and it creates very bad working situations, as evidenced by a certain previous place of employment (among other issues there).
I had a student that rolled her eyes at something on her first evening of clinicals, but luckily in my case I get to respond to their weekly journals where I mentioned it in a nice way, something like "I know it is overwhelming when something gets added to you work", and she talked to me later, and she has done well since. That said, I know I have been guilty of the eye rolling myself in the past, but I try not to, because I know how bad it is.
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