Oily needs

I don't care about cars. Sure, I don't mind driving a cool-looking convertible, or a neat vintage car, but on the whole I really don't care what I drive, as long as it runs. This lack of care extends beyond a car preference though, and includes such basic things as washing one's car, vacuuming the interior, checking tire pressure, and even changing the oil. When it comes to my car, I guess I'm like most men when it comes to anything emotional: if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

And you know, this approach really used to work for me. Up until about two years ago, all the cars I owned saw little usage. Sure, I racked up a few miles when we lived in Germany and I would drive to Holland every so often, but it was never really enough for my car to warrant constant care. I would wash whenever the windshield got so dirty I would have to look between the dead bugs to see anything; I would have my oil changed whenever the mood struck me, and things were merry. But no more. With a daily 180 mile commute, my car suddenly needs constant, and I mean, constant care. To stay with the relationship angle; my car has suddenly become a very needy girlfriend.

Now I don't care much for needy, or high-maintenance antyhings. Be it students, husbands, children, dogs, computers, or cars, I'd much prefer it if things and people generally took care of themselves. As a result of that, my car gets the short end of the stick. If it weren't for my darling husband taking it to the carwash and vacuuming it out every once in a while, it would have enough protein on the outside of the car, and crumbs and other lost morsels of food (I blame the kids for that one) on the inside to cook a full meal.

But the cleanliness is not really the problem here. Sure a clean car is a happy car, but what's much more important is maintenance. See, I don't care about these things at all, but I've owned the car for two years now, and already put 75000 miles on it. According to husband-dear, that's almost phenomenal, and means that if we want to keep the car for another, oh 100 000 miles, we need to take extra good care of the engine. Which, apparently, I don't. I don't think about changing the oil until the maintenance light comes on. Of course, this light always comes on on a Wednesday morning, when I don't have time to go to the shop until Saturday, at which point I will have already added another 800 miles to the poor oil's already depleted life. So what I need to do is schedule oil changes in advance. I need to sit down, calculate when I've driven another 5000 miles, and plan an oil change weeks in advance. Only I don't do that. It's not that I don't care about my car, because I do, but I just don't care about miniscule details such as oil changes.

Unfortunately, husband-dear does. So every time I tell him, "Oops, the maintenance light came in, and I don't have time to go in until next week", he loses another year off his life. However, yesterday, I finally came up with the solution. The dreaded light had come on in the morning, and I had my plan ready. When I came home last night, I told husband-dear, "Remember how you always tell me I'm a good thing in your life?"
"Yes" came the somewhat cautious reply
"So I'm a good thing, right?"
"Well, yes." A slight suspicious pause, "Did you hit another piece of tire on the highway again?"
"Oh no, no, no. Of course not. No. You see, my maintenance light came on this morning."
"Oh God. I told you to do it last weekend."
"I know, but I worked last weekend, remember. Because I'm dedicated and hard-working, and all those things you like."
"Hmmm.."
"So here's my plan. But just remember how much you like me. If I take your truck to work tomorrow, you can take my car, and then run it by the quick lube after you get off work. That way we don't have put another three hundred miles on it."
"So you would take my truck, and I would do this for you?"
"Yep."

Needless to say, I drove the truck to work today, and husband-dear sighed at the tought of having to face the gate guards with my pink-tagged red little Honda once again. Life is good.