What's in a name?

Well, a whole lot apparently. I never knew I was this attached to my maiden name, until, well, today. Don’t get me wrong, I like being Mrs. Married name. I really do. But at home only. At work, I have been, and always will be Dr. Maiden name, or Dr. Maiden-married name if I have to. It’s what I have always been, and it’s who I am. I like it that way, my husband likes it that way, my students like it that way, everyone likes it that way. Except, since today, my work.

Before I launch into an entire diatribe, please allow me to clarify. For many years, before I was married, I worked and published using my maiden name. Because you can’t just change your name when you’re an academic (people wouldn’t know whose publications to look for anymore, Mrs. Smith or Mrs. Jones), I wanted to hyphenate my last names when I got married. That way, I figured, I could use both, and then simply drop the married name when publishing. However, because of a snafu when acquiring my military ID, I was given my husband’s name. Subsequently, all my American documentation solely contains my husband’s name, while my Dutch passport contains both. This was never a problem at work. I would fill out all legal paperwork using my married name, and then hyphenate everywhere else. I would explain saying “I had a career before I had a husband”, and everyone would smile and say they understood.

Well, maybe the smiling was another example of southern politeness, because today some people seemed to not understand anymore. Today I got a phone call from one of our secretaries that I really couldn’t hyphenate my name anymore because, well, they weren't entirely sure why, but I couldn’t. Or so they thought. But may not. But it was all very complicated either way. At first HR was blamed, since their records of me are in my married name, and all records have to be synchronized. But a phone call to a very understanding head of HR revealed that they had no problem with my hyphenated last name. Then it was a SACS (southern association of colleges and schools) requirement that all records must use the same name, until I pointed out SACS had no access to my HR records, and that all other records were under my hyphenated last name. The last thing I heard was that it had to do with the way I signed all of my forms. Apparently I might be able to keep my hyphenated last name, but then I can’t sign my paperwork using my married name anymore. I would possibly have to come back in and re-sign all my paperwork with my hyphenated last name. If that was at all possible. But they weren’t sure. The last thing I heard was someone telling me; “I really don’t see what’s wrong with changing your name to Dr. Married name anyway”.

Now slap me upside the head and call me silly, but what on earth is going on here? Synchronized records? Re-signing paperwork? Since when does your signature have to reflect your entire name? I once signed my passport with just my first name and a smiley face on the “i”. Granted, I was 12, but still. And since when do strangers have access to all of your HR records? And even if they do, shouldn’t they be able to figure out that Dr. X in one record and Dr. X-Y in another (and trust me, my last names are odd enough that there is no one else at the university with that name, I checked), is the same person? And moreover, since when does anyone have the right to tell me there is nothing wrong with adopting a different name?

I know I usually don’t rant in my blog, but I really could not help myself this time. I honestly can’t ever see this happening in the Netherlands. I remember dozens of co-workers who were married and had no problem using their maiden name for everything. Granted, it helps that in the Netherlands you never lose your maiden name when you marry. But in spite of that rule, I can’t imagine having the same discussion at my old work. So it’s definitely possible that this is a cultural issue. But cultural issue or not, I will figure this one out. If nothing else, I will just really upset the applecart, and just let all my students call me by my first name…:)