A small new leaf

“The truth shall set you free…”

Just when I had resigned myself to living in a world where “sure” means “no”, saying “that sucks” leads to at least a gasp and a “oh my”, “crap” is considered a cutting-edge cuss word, and no matter how many times people ask you how they are, they still don’t really care, I shared a completely eye-opening truth-filled moment with a friend this weekend.

It started because we both attended a social on Saturday where I spent the better part of two hours feeling slightly awkward. Although the women there were really friendly, and the food was great, I still could not help but feeling like an anthropologist on her first field trip. It started when a lady new to town (and dear to me already) said “Well that just pissed me off” and had at least two other ladies in absolute shock. It got worse when I heard one woman ask another how she was. The second lady apparently decided to throw all Georgia etiquette in the wind, and said; “Well, it’s okay”, which is the southern equivalent of saying that you are just about ready to throw in the towel. Instead of asking what was wrong; we were, after all, at a church, the first women smiled, said; “Okay”, and moved on. And I knew this wasn’t going to be my party when a third woman told me her husband’s return from his first deployment had been postponed indefinitely, but that that was “really fine, oh yeah, I mean, I’m having a great time! ”.

Now imagine my complete relief, total surprise, and absolute delight when we got home and my friend turned to me and asked; “Wow, did you find that as awkward as I did?” It was a total epiphany to find that someone, who in my eyes was, and is, the perfect southern lady (I mean she’s nice, polite, knows how to get along with everyone, and is a great cook to boot), felt the exact same way I did.

It got even better when I mumbled something like; “And this whole cussing thing gets on my nerves. Sometimes I feel so repressed, I just want to run off my mouth like a sailor, and she replied; “I know! Me too!”
“You do not swear.” I said unbelieving.
“Hell yeah I swear. You should hear me at home sometimes.”

It felt like rediscovering my friend all over again. Suddenly we both just opened up, and found that we both get so tired of the lack of authenticity, the people who pretend to care but don’t, the judging, the pressure, the competition, and all the other things that have been bothering me for the past year. So during our run we decided we were going to do things differently from now on. No more pretending, no more playing along with the “my kids/husband/family/home/career/faith” is better than you game, no more hypocrisy. We were just going to be real. Hallelujah, life is going to get a whole lot better now!

“…and thank God Almighty I’m free at last!”